Life gave its worse side to Luna all at once, having to deal with her fathers failing health and their financial struggles was enough frustration
Jamari on the other hand has none of that to worry about. Although growing up without his mother was s...
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Starring hard at the laptop before me, I sat deep in thought. Is it anger I feel? Perhaps regret? I felt the heat in my chest. It only comes when I feel the need to explode. My publicist called me this morning concerning the recent posts on the blogs. It was a blur picture of Luna and I hugging. Every freaking body wanted to know who she is. That's not even the worse part. Janice posted some stupid shot on her Instagram page. She posted a picture of her and my dad with some disturbing write up. 'Leaving a toxic relationship is the best thing a woman can do for herself. When you're seen as less of what you're worth, you better leave sis! You're worth so much more sis! Abuse of any sort should not be overlooked. I am in a place of deep joy. I'm happy about the decisions I made. Nobody can tell me shit!. I found love where I wasn't given love! '
Now. The entire world thinks Janice and I's relationship was an abusive one. People are judging me, saying the was I always mug shows there's a possibility she's telling the truth. I feel really devastated right now. "Don't worry Jamari. I'd fix it" my publicist Veronica said. I eyed her like she was crazy. "That's your job. Do it well" With that I got up and headed out. I was pissed. Too damn pissed. I was called out early this morning. Just for this. I was speeding, on my way to the place I promised myself never to return to. My fathers house. Arriving the house, I wasted no time in hopping outta my car. I opened the door without an invite and stepped in. "Jamari! What are you doing here! " Janice said surprised at my visit as she got up from the couch. "Yknow why I'm here hoe, don't play with me" she scoffed and rolled her eyes as she walked towards the staircase. I was faster than her. I blocked her and starred down at her with so much hate. I once loved this woman. I let her become part of me. I gave her all I could. She knew me so well. Then one day, I left for New Jersey. I begged her to come with me for weeks. She refused. I begged her to have my baby, she said no. I left because of my career. I came to visit her after a month to surprise her, cos she was still mad that I moved. The most disgusting thing I've ever seen. My girlfriend in bed with the man you abused me as a child. My damn father. They had this going on even before I left for New Jersey. Every emotional progress I had made came crashing down. I lost myself, again. "You're a snake, you're a freaking disease Janice. And for all the shit you put me through, you're gonna rot in hell! Didn't I let you be? Huh? I let you be with your loser of a husband. I accepted the fact that you never loved me" "I loved you Jamari! I freaking loved you" Janice interrupted me in her irritating high pitched voice. "Shut up Janice. Even if you did, I don't care. Because I hate you so freaking much now. Whatever it was that we shared, its in the past. Dead, buried and freaking decayed! Why are you tryna make me look bad on social media? Answer me bitch! " Janice seemed to be shocked at my outburst. "You don't mean that Jamari. You don't hate me! You think some other bitch is going to make you forget about me? " "I've long deleted you outta my body, soul and mind Janice. You are a disease. I can't be healthy when you're close" Before I knew what was happening, Janice had smacked me hard on my left cheek. I was stunned. She didn't just do that. "You wanna hit me Jamari? Huh? Come on! Let the whole world know your an angry psycho maniac! " I could feel my hands shake due too how angry I had become. "What is going on in here? Jamari, why the sudden visit" my dad said coming down the stairs. "You had no excuse Janice. Both of you deserve each other. Demons don't mix well with angels. That's why you mixed with my dad, the devil. Let my name stay outta you dick sucking mouth Janice." with that I stormed out of their house. Ignoring my father as he called me back. I drove home in silence. My phone kept on ringing. Rameek called, Tania called, and Luna did too. I didn't wanna talk to nobody. I wanted to be alone. A lot was going through my mind. I never got to know my momma. She died after I was born. I grew up with my nana standing in ad a mother figure. My dad never loved me. He said he did tho, but that was a lie. He'd beat the hell outta me everyday. Locking me up in my room and starving me. I loved being with my nana. She was the one who showed me love. Everyone believed my mom's passing caused my dad's actions but I beg to differ. That man was a retarded sucka. Now, my ex is married to him. Thinking about all this gives me a migraine.
