How To Tame Me

Chapter 15

Rachel

"So, you still avoiding me?" I turned to find my mother standing there. In a way yes I was avoiding her but not for the reasons she thought. I was more so avoiding her because I didn't want her questioning me about my sex life and when was I going to get a damn man. Well mommy dearest men did not excite me. But you know who did? Women. My girlfriend to be more precise In a way I felt bad for hiding my girlfriend from my mom. I felt bad for hiding my sexuality away from her, but knowing how she felt about gay relationships had me afraid to face her. And Yolanda was right. I was afraid to tell her about who I really was. For the simple fact of her disowning me. But Although I was afraid to let her see the real me I wasn't going to be hemmed up in the house either. I couldn't even if I wanted to. Yolanda wouldn't allow it. I we had a dinner date tonight by the way.

"No I'm not avoiding you. I thought you were still mad at me."

"No I'm not mad. Well not anymore. I can't stay mad at my children." She came and gave me a hug. "Is that why you haven't been coming to my cookouts?" I nodded my head but that wasn't the reason. Brandy's goofy ass always invited Yolanda and every time we were out in public together she always kissed me and it was mostly when people was around. I wasn't ready for her to put me on the spot when it came to my family so I avoided being around her and my family at the same time.  But we did have a date night tonight and I was excited to go out. This wouldn't be our first time going out but every time we did go out it always felt like the first time. I told myself it was because I called myself hiding my sexuality. It gave me an anxiety rush when we went out. But I welcomed it. For now I did. 

"You with her?" I looked over my shoulder to find Yolanda coming our way. Mom didn't like her because of her sexuality but my baby didn't care. I couldn't have her kissing me in front of my mother. And she arched her brow up at me. I probably had a scary look on my face. In fact I knew I did. Please don't kiss me in front of my mother. I prayed. 

"Hello." She said as she came to a stop beside me. 

"Hey." Mom said with distaste in her mouth and Yolanda snorted. 

"Are we still on for tonight?" She asked and I nodded. "Okay, see you then." 

"Okay." I watched as she walked away. 

"What you two doing tonight?"

"Business work." I lied.  

"She likes you." She stated matter-of-factly.

"You think so?" 

"I see the way she looks at you. That doesn't make you uncomfortable?"

"Why should it?"

"Because she's gay."

"So?" I found myself growing annoyed. 

"She might try to kiss you."

"Mom, gay people don't scare me. I don't see them any different then anyone else. We had this conversation before. I'm not a homophobe. Besides just because she's gay doesn't mean she will try something with me. That's not how being gay works."

"I know that. I have a gay friend." She said as if that was supposed to help the situation. 

"Just as long as your kids aren't gay right? Just as long as no gay people are near us right? I don't know what you have against gay people but you really need to get over it." I started walking away but turned back to face her. "You know, what if one of your children was gay? What then? You would disown us? Did you ever stop to think that some of us are afraid to be ourselves around you because you're so damn judgmental. Yolanda is a cool person mom. She owns her own business. She just bought her first house all on her own. But instead of seeing a black woman that accomplished so much on her own and instead of congratulating her you hate her because she likes women. As if she's sleeping with you. That woman did nothing to you but be herself. And if you actually talk to her you would find that she is a very smart woman. She's looking into buying another business. Stop judging people because of what you don't like about them and look at the greatness they are accomplishing. For a woman that's all about woman rights and the power we possess you sure are doing a piss poor job at supporting the women around you. The black women around you. You need you fix your heart instead of turning your noise up at people you see as devilish and abomination because they decided to love who they are." With that I turned and left her standing there. I was really getting tired of that woman.