Jk's p.o.v: They say there's an end to everything that ever existed in this world. Nothing lasts forever, no misery , no happiness. One dies to give birth to the other , the night fades with the rising sun giving end to the misery. The little bubble of fantasy that we made in the short span of being together is always being challenged to have the certain end , end of misery or end of eternal happiness is still unknown. It's been a whole week that the company held the meeting about the upcoming world tour in few days . With the release of the latest album our fandom is increasing , so is our responsibility to the ARMY who deserve to see us in person, giving them the best show we can . The news of tour has always been the most exciting to me . The thrill of being on stage, fans cheering loud , their appreciation, their tears all together keep me going, make me want to perfect everything for them . This time was of no different. The excitement was as it has always been but with it the realisation of being far far away from home , my only home came crushing down.
Six months is a long time span , longer than the period y/n and I've been together. I wonder if our relationship was that strong to fight the blow of thousands miles away distance for half a year or more. The little arguments we had have taught me one thing that there's always been a fear of losing eachother to the fate of reality . The trust isn't so easy to build in months . It takes time , communication. But the time to communicate is what we're short of always. But before everything, being honest to each others ' feeling is the first and foremost for creating the castle of trust.
So I had to share the news with y/n as soon as I came home that night after the meeting. It didn't go as I imagined it would. Y/n was surprisingly not upset at all . She took it so casually as if I was saying her about my visit to the nearby market. To make her understand that I'm going for six months I had even repeated my words again. All she did was , gave me the biggest smile I've seen on her face and said "it's not a big deal. Have a successful tour. I'll be waiting here forever!"
I was speechless for a moment. Searching for any emotion that might've betrayed what she's saying in her eyes. But I found none. Her eyes were numb. Those eyes that always portrayed every emotion like an open book were guarded. And that very moment I knew this six months wouldn't be easy for either of us .
The whole week after that day has been going too magical to be true. We both didn't mention anything about the tour even once after that. But the change was evident in both of our parts. The morning cuddles got dragged till noon . Showering together has been a daily routine. TV shows left unwatched at the background too often when we were indulged in each other every time. Nights felt more intimate with the way y/n held me too close to her heart like she was breathing me in as much as she could. Sometimes I'd wake up at midnight to her wide awake and watching me silently. I didn't ask the reason for her sudden insomnia. I let her act the way she wanted . I let her act like everything is okay and we'll be okay . But I know a time will come when her wall will crumble. I wish the time comes sooner though so that I could be at least by her side when she falls . . . . A day to go till my boarding to Paris . Last few days our team members have been passing hectic hrs choosing outfits, perfecting every dance moves and trying their best to keep up the energy lifted. I've found a very little time to sneak out during my break time to meet y/ n at home but couldn't find her there always. I sometimes tend to forget I had a woman who's a wonderful doctor too, strong , kind and dedicated. So the time spent together was so limited that it felt like we're in a long distant relationship being in the same country, in same house. I fear how we will overcome the days to come!
Y/n's p.o.v:
I've been doing great keeping my cool in front of jungkook. I kept telling myself that it's not the time to give him a reason to feel obliged to be tied with me only because I've this immense fear that he'll forget me once he's up there meeting new people, getting busier every day achieving new heights to even look back at the shabby me . The cruelest thought I had the time he announced his departure is that he'll regret his decision of choosing me out of all people, so emotionally vulnerable, always in need of assurance of love. So I mastered the biggest smile and said him it'll be okay, that I'll be here always. But will he be here ?? Will he find his way back home at the end?? Where does he see his end I wonder!! Does he even think about our end!!
But now when I'm here alone left with my thoughts trying to keep myself busy at the hospital, the depth of all this things settle in finally. I feel like someone is trying to pull my heart out of my body with agonising grip and all I could do is smile through pain . What could I even do at this point! Jungkook is already risking so much trying to keep me close to him knowing very well how it'll blow his career once any news about our togetherness leaks anyhow. I couldn't burden him with another reason to worry. I loved him dearly with his all, his dreams, his despair. But I would not be able to be the reason of his despair even in my darkest nightmare. I'd better end my existence than to hurt himself with it .
I've seen people break due to long distance, also seen some becoming stronger as a couple after a long distance finding themselves together through thick and thin, through laughters and tears. I only wish we could do the same . No matter how many days with tears it's spent in longing, we get to share it together at the end. Our end.
Jk's p.o.v:
Last night was a devastating one to realise what I'm gonna miss from tomorrow. The mild scent of lavender of the shampoo y/n uses , the soft locks of hair that irk me sometimes in my sleep but I still love to comb my fingers through it , pulling y/ n closer into my arms to whisper sweet nothing into sleep. The soft eyes that search mines as soon as they're open to the morning sunlight fearing I've left them unattended. The morning kisses I get in exchange of y/n's giggles. I'll miss my another version of euphoria. I'll miss me , the happy unbothered me who's loved in every possible way with his flaws with all his scars by the sweetest person alive, my y/n.
As I woke up to an empty bed only to find y/n preparing breakfast for me and packing some snacks in my luggage silently without sparing me a glance , it started to feel suffocating. I know she's avoiding to confront me fearing I'd see her clogged tears . But I wanted to see her break into my arms . Wanted to assure her that it'll pass by cause in no way I'm doing it better getting away from her. It's okay to cry till it's me who's with her when she does. But she doesn't even shed a single drop of tear. It's nearly time for me to get in the car towards the airport when I ask y/n who's arranging the cushions already arranged on the sofa for the 3rd time since morning , "Y/n! Would you like to come see me off?"
The silence that followed almost assured me that she's not gonna answer me and I must leave now . But then the smallest sentence came when I clutched the handle of my luggage " I can?!"
I followed the sound and the scene broke me heart . Y/ n was sobbing silently. Her eyelashes drenched in tears and eyebags already swollen. For how long she's been crying I don't wanna know. All I know is I want to kiss her pain away . So I did. Leaving the luggage right there I lunched forward taking her in my arms and crying and kissing her in between to say "You always can, love !"
A.n: Yes I love to torture myself. I literally cried while writing this. My husband is going to military for god's sake🥺 I love him the way I've never loved anyone.
Btw, do you think it's the end of story? 👀 Let me know . While you're reading it please spare two minutes to vote BTS here : https://global.idolplus.com/vote/NTJjNGI2YW
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