Chapter 4 "Tomorrow"

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She sighed. She struggled hard to tell him but had already made the first step. There was no way back anymore, and she knew that. She wanted to tell him what had happened. She knew that he would believe her and she had a higher position. He could do something. But it would be hard to tell him. She knew she had to. Not just for herself. She was almost sure when he did that with her, he would do it to other women too, or maybe he had already done it to other ones before who hadn't been strong enough to say something. Just like her before.

And with that in her head, she spoke up.

"Well... when I tranfered the station, it had a reason. I-"

A knock interprupped their conversation.

"Hey Chen, Salton, you ok?"

Lucy felt like she might throw up, and she could tell that her former rookie was in the same state. Because the voice who had made her stop talking was no other person than Mick Carson.

Tim recognized that gaze. Two years ago, Rosalind had escaped from prison, and that had feared her as hell. She had been looking exactly like this, so Tim wondered why he saw this expression again, by someone she used to work with. But after a few more seconds of silence, he saw Lucy gigvnig Salton a confident smile, which she responded with a nod, and tehn answered with a fake smile while opening the door.

"Yes. Everything is fine. It's so nice to see you again, Captain Carson."
She was good in Undercover Job, and as someone who hadn't seen her in Five years anymore, Tim knew that he would by what she selled him. But who knew her well enough could tell that she was lying.

The rest of the day went by pretty smoothly. There were a few rough calls, but Tim never saw Lucy in the state like on the toilet again. Her diabetis wans't doing roumores too, so that they left Station when shift was over. But when Tim wanted to come back on that what she had tried to tell him at the restroom, she just said that she was tired and went into her room, without another word.

This night, Tim woke up from a silent voice, non-stop Talking. Confused, he got out of his bed and followed the wreid sounds into the kitchen, where he found Lucy sitting at the kitchen counter. She had earphones in and on her Display you could see that she was ont he phone with someone at, Tim looked on the Clock, 2:36am. The counter was flooded in papers with text and thoughts, or plans, or something like that on it. Then he saw Lucy sitting there, completely tired but still talking without a break, one leg bouncing and her hands slightly shaking.

Tim decided that he would listen a little bit before coming in.

"Ok, but we already had this option. Do you think he could do it again and use my diabetis as pressure?"

"Yes, I told here, but he still could tell them I didn't before and maybe ruining my career with it."

Lucy then looked up a little too much and noticed Tim. The reaction was a quick bye to the other person and ended the call with this.

Tim entered the room fully and first looked at her with a judjing, but fast turning into a worrying expression.

Lucys Hands were still shaking light and her leg still bouncing, when Tim sat down next to her. Her eyes were barely kept open, and a few strands of her hair were hanging down from a messy bun. He gently braided one of them behind her ear before asking about the Elefant in the room.

"What was that?"

"Uh... Nothing."

"And now the truth."

"I..."
She deeply sighed. She was extremely tired and just felt off caused by the stress she had had the whole day. The truth was that she had called Hailey to find out what Carson was planning. They knew that he wasn't dumb. The opposite, he was actually pretty smart, but he didn't always use it in a good way. They had talked and talked and talked. Coming uo withmoer and more possibilities, one more scaring than the last one and the other just canceled again. Lucy couldn't deny but was afraid of this man, and that was for a good reason. He sure still could ruin her career if the intern would find out that she had lied about her diabetis earlier.

She snapped out of her thoughts when she heard Tim sofly but worried, saying

"Hey, did you stress a lot? You're shaking. You know too much isn't good with your diabetis."

Not that again. Sometimes, she wished she just hadn't told him about it because even if you think that he was a badass who cared about nobody, he actulla was the most worrying and caring person on earth. Of course, Lucy was greatfull for this, but sometimes, like in that moment, she just was not.

"I know."

She told him as she put her face into her hands, near to falling asleep.

"Wanna tell me what's going on?"

"No, it isn't really an option, right?"

"Lucy."

Tim answered sternly, but that was just because he was really worried about her, and she knew that. But she knew too that she really wanted to sleep now. Just at that thought, she let out a big yawn, but then the reason why she was doing this shot back into her mind and woke her up.

"Let's talk about that after sleeping, ok?"

He gave in but knew she wouldn't go asleep if he wouldn't get her to.

"Fine..."

That was good, she thought, hope raising that she could just go on.

"But I will stay until you fall asleep because I know otherwise you won't do it."

And that is bad. Shit. Okay. She could just go on... when she had made him forget what could get hard, that he wanted to talk to her about something.

As he said, Tim went with her to the bathroom and looked put for her sugar, which was as expected a bit too high, and then didn't leave her side until she closed her eyes. And after just a few seconds, she fell asleep.

But in her tired state, she had made a big mistake. Because when Tim went through the kitchen  to get back into his room, he saw all of the papers still laying on the counter. He couldn't help but take a look at them.

"Will he rape another woman?"

"Will he rape me again?"

"Does he know that Salton transferred because she knew?"

"Will he ruin my career with diabetis?"

"Why didn't he appear earlier? Mabey because he is a Captain now?"

"To how many other women did he do it since I am gone?"

"Is it my fault?"

"Should I have done something?"

"I am a bad person... I should've."

He was shocked about everything he had just gotten to know in such a short time. But the last sentences had broken him. She felt guilty, and that as hell.
He knew she normally wouldn't have written down her thoughts that specifically, but must've been so tired that she had just written down everything that had crossed her mind.

He was already storming to her room to confront her about it, when he abruptly stopped. Tears were burning in his eyes and he really wanted to, but knew that she had to sleep.

Tommorow.

Tim thought. He had to do it even if he didn't want to hurt her, so.

Tommorow.

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