We've Only Just Begun

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She stood there staring at the two pink lines on the test in her hand, her mind torn between joy and sheer terror. She knew it was stupid to hope he'd react happily, but couldn't help holding on to the fantasy in her head. The hand she was dealt was terribly different than the one she'd dreamt of as a girl. She had fallen in love, or so she thought. He was everything she wanted in the beginning. Kind, loving, fun, but the mask began to slip. It was gradual, slow enough to keep her from running, but he had changed nonetheless. Seeing her happy wasn't met with joy anymore, but a seemingly sick desire to tear it away from her weakening grip. Loving touches turned intimidating, never knowing when they'd leave a bruise that she'd have to work to cover up. She couldn't seem to please him anymore, but it didn't stop her from trying with what little energy she had left.

And now this. She knew. She knew this meant trouble. It made her sad to think it, seeing as most couples would be over the moon seeing these two little lines. But to her, even though she wanted it so badly, they made her stomach churn.

Footsteps down the hall made her hurriedly grab the nearest drawer and shove the test under the miscellaneous junk that lay in it. She wasn't ready to face that battle just yet. It had already been fight after fight for so long, she knew she'd need time to prepare for this one. She looked over herself in the mirror, making sure there was nothing in her eyes that would give her away. With a deep breath, she turned the handle and silently walked down the hallway to their shared room.

Her husband turned to look up at her from his desk, not bothering to return the smile she gave him.

"I should probably get going," she said as she grabbed her purse, "I'm already late."

He scoffed, turning back to his computer. Normally she would fight for some sort of reaction. His newfound indifference to her usually angered her more than she would like to admit. She let her smile fall and ignored the pit in her stomach as she walked down the stairs and out the door.

The cool air was a relief from the claustrophobic atmosphere permeating her home. It was fall, her favorite season and despite the growing sadness in her heart, she let her smile return as she breathed in the crisp air. Halloween was coming.

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