𝓛.𝓐.

𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 34

📍Hospital Same Night

                      ———————————

I've been staring at the wall waiting for the doctor to come in with results

"Mama you good" Booka asks rubbing my shoulder

Before i could respond the doctor comes in and knocks on the door

"yes?" i answer softly

"um i do have some bad but good news" she says looking down

I look at booka and he grabs my hand

"go ahead .."

"Well... i'm sorry to say this but Ms. Parker but you had a miscarriage"

i stay completely silent and start getting teary eyed

"Im so sorry ma'am but your body is handling it well with no complications"

"oh.."

" i'll give you two some privacy " she leaves
the room closing the door behind her

Booka doesn't say anything and just pulls me in for a hug

"I- I didn't know.. i swear i didn't, this is all my fault" i immediately break down crying on his chest

"no it's not mama i promise you it's not" he comforts me struggling not to cry too

"i failed our baby bryson..."

This moment felt worse than seeing my dad get locked up for life

———————

2am

Nelly wanted Imani to come so i stepped outside for a min

I unlock my car and get in seeing some blood still on my seat making me break down

Usually i'm a strong nigga but for some reason i couldn't hold it in

I wanted to blame somebody so fuckin bad but I knew I couldn't

The only person i could put the blame on was me for not stopping that shit

I run a hand down my face then reach in my pocket and grab a blunt to spark up before driving off to the store

Smoking da whole way there, eventually, I pull into the dollar store parking lot down the street, hop out my car, lock it, and go inside

I grab a shopping cart and go to the cleaning supplies aisle

Since it wasn't a lot of blood and just some drips and smudges I grab Clorox Wipes, Mr.Clean spray, and rags

After getting everything i go checkout and leave, getting in my car, driving back to the hospital

I pull into the parking lot and get out

Grabbing the bag of supplies i spray my seat with the Mr.Clean and wipe it up with the rag a couple times

Then i wipe the seat down with clorox wipes, lock it and go inside the hospital stopping at starbucks to get her Pink Drink

Taking da elevator up , i open the door and see nelly sleepin

Mani gets up from the chair next to her hospital and comes over to me

"She cried herself to sleep.."

my face softens

"at least she getting sleep" i run my hand down my face and sigh

"you can have this since she's sleep" i pass her the drink

"thank youu, imma go now tho, take care of my best friend please"

" i gotchu "

we side hug and she goes over to hug Jannelee before grabbing her purse and leaving

i pick up my phone and look at the time seeing 3:15

"shii i needa take my ahh to sleep" i mumble to myself

nelly rolls over making look dead at her to see if she was gon wake up but she ain't so i continued getting comfortable in dis hard ass pull out couch thingy

"Night ma, i love you" i mumble to her before dozin off ...